I know I need my husband’s attention before telling him something I want him to remember. We used to argue about it. It frustrated me. Okay, every now and then it still does. But in general, I try to work with it and just make sure I have his attention before beginning.

He was sitting at his computer when I said his name so he’d look up before I explained to him, “Instead of making a special trip to the store on Monday, I was thinking. Since we’re going to your parents on Sunday…I know we’ll have a long drive home, but do you mind stopping by the store before we get home?”

A brief pause and no response indicated his mind was still on the computer. I asked him if he’d like me to repeat what I’d said. “Yes, that would be good. Thanks.”

Repeat.

Perplexed stare.

“Did you hear me this time?”

“Yes.”

“What did I say?”

“That you’re going to do the shopping on Monday.”

I laughed, repeated it one more time, and he got it.

I have to give Tim credit. He’s actually a good listener most of the time. It’s just when he’s already focused on something else that leads to a problem. Reading a book or watching TV are the biggies. I used to get personally offended, thinking he wasn’t listening to me because he didn’t want to listen. What I said wasn’t important to him. So I thought.

But don’t we all have things and people we’ll listen to more (or less) than others? Some of it has to do with how much we want to hear or ignore something, but more often, I think it’s a focus issue. It’s timing and priorities.

When do you struggle most to listen well to others?

For me, it’s when I’m writing. I get “in the zone.” If there’s a break in my thoughts, there’s a break in my fingers as they fly across the keyboard. But I primarily write at home, and there are people I love around me, and I want to show them I love and respect them by
listening.

I also struggle to listen when I’m studying my Bible but for another reason. I need to concentrate to grasp what I’m studying. With writing, it’s about the outflow. With study, it’s about the inflow.

When the girls were younger, I wanted to study while they were awake, because I wanted to set an example for them. If I always studied when they were asleep, how would they know I took Bible study seriously? But I also didn’t want to be interrupted constantly, so I taught them to place a hand on my shoulder or arm to let me know they needed something. As soon as I could take a break, I’d turn and ask about what they needed.

On the other hand, sometimes when I’m writing, Courtney assures me I look at her with a disgusted look when she’s trying to share a story with me. I try to rationalize my response, but that’s her perspective of my reaction, so I have to consider she’s at least partially
right!

How do you respond when you’re interrupted?

What connections have you experienced among listening, interruptions, and God?

Happy are those who listen to me, watching at my door every day, waiting at my open doorway. Proverbs 8:34