Fighting for Control

Fighting for Control

photo-1488523811425-75699793b3e5I put some things in motion.

I was in a frustrating situation and process, and I had taken numerous steps to resolve it, but I wasn’t getting much help. It’s not something I could do on my own. I tried different kinds of persuasion, assistance, accountability, but to no avail. I tried to settle into the lessons I was learning about patience and compassion, but I was also frustrated. I explored other options, and I was satisfied that I had put some things in motion to give myself options. I could see which solution would begin to develop and be ready with additional options just in case.

As I was thinking about my satisfaction in how I was handling the options, another thought screamed at me, “Who was I kidding?”

God is the one who has put things into motion. He certainly uses me, so it’s not as if I have nothing to do with what’s in motion. I’m not off the hook if I don’t take some responsibility. Hopefully I’ve listened well, and I’m working alongside him, but let’s be honest. He puts lots of things in motion that aren’t nearly as short-sighted as my stuff. I need to continue to lean into him and follow well.

Following well and fighting for control are not the same thing. Ugh. That’s so hard when things aren’t moving at the speed or in the way I want.

But God knows better than me. And he knows better than you.

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