My friend’s husband unexpectedly died a couple years ago. She recently posted, “It is well with my soul…my heart and mind not so much.”
I agree. My circumstance is not the same, but the sentiment is. I can have a deep peace with God without feeling great about a circumstance. I can not understand yet trust God as I move forward. The certainties of God can overshadow the uncertainties of my life. My choice in faith can ease my heartache.
I can honestly claim “it is well with my soul.” It’s not that I choose wellness; it is that I choose to continually trust God with my soul. As I set myself, my concerns, and my comforts aside, I make space for him. And he is always faithful to reside in that space. He makes it well with my soul because of who he is.
You might be struggling today. That’s okay. You don’t have to put on a smiling face and pretend it’s all okay. But struggle toward God. Struggle to choose him, to know him, to trust him. One bit at a time, you will be well.
Amen.
I haven’t lost my husband through divorce or death, but since the death of my mother last September I have struggled in my own journey. I dealt with the necessities at the time, but now am facing the huge task of finally going through her personal belongings and getting rid of stuff. People tell me “hire that done.” Right. My daughter and her husband are living in Mom’s house, so having a sale like most estate companies want to do is more challenging. And frankly there is a lot of stuff that just would not sell. It needs thrown out or, as in the case of 30 years of papers she saved, shredded. Finding free shredding services is next to impossible in our area. By the time I discovered the one my bank hosted, it was on a day that we were not able to get there…and they limited the amount to two boxes. So I am slowly shredding stuff on my own I’m between loads of laundry and errands and my job.
So no, my heart is not well. At all. Neither is my mind. And I’m tired. Just never seems to end.
I am so very sorry, Shauna. What a burden you must feel! I pray that your burden eases a bit as you begin to work through the process, but I know you will have some very rough moments and days. I’m specifically praying you sense God’s presence and that he provides in creative ways. I so wish I could be there with you, but I will be encouraging you the best I can from a distance!
If you message me at susan@purepurpose.org and remind me where you live, I’ll see if I know anyone closeby who might be able to help with your shredding and other challenges.