I opened Timehop to find a smiling pup from three years ago. The caption mentioned enjoying time with her on the deck. And that simple memory stilled me.

The deck, which was at the house where my ex and I had lived for less than two months. One of the two decks I’d enjoyed working hours on as I stained them, which made me think of many of the other projects I’d worked on in those few months. I wanted to make a home – a home I actually prepared for someone else. Several months later, I moved out when my ex no longer wanted me there and it was no longer a safe home for me.

I made a new home for myself (and my cute pup).

I swiped through Timehop a bit farther and saw a photo of my ex and me on the beach from six years ago. I looked happy. So did he. But I suppose things aren’t what they seem at times.

I stilled myself and reflected on those memories and looked forward. I am continuing to build a home for myself (and my pup). I still love the beach. I still enjoy traveling. I still share life with special people.

I still.

Those two words have more than one meaning for me.

Be still today. Remember. Savor. Anticipate.