My Life with God

Fractured Friends

“…because watching you struggle even from a distance, seeing your fervent trust in God through it all, encourages me.” 

It’s true. As I was celebrating good news with this person, I was also saddened by the small but present drain that family divisiveness siphons from such moments. It hurts this mama’s heart to see her now-big-littles deal with fractures and voids. My friend celebrated with me and acknowledged such high moments sometimes highlight the rippling effects hurt causes, often simply an annoying reminder of past hurts. She could relate. Our stories are different but some of those lasting effects that create fissures among a family feel similar. Maybe you can relate, too. It’s not that we don’t enjoy the beauty and sure-footing as we move forward, but it’s as if significant events carry just enough weight to create a bit of a rumble and quake. Perhaps it’s not perceptible to everyone. Perhaps some get knocked off their feet. We sometimes don’t know how something will impact us as well as those around us.

My friend and I didn’t dwell on the quake for long. Our gratitude for God’s goodness steadies us both. And I appreciate her authenticity. We are able to share without having lived each other’s lives. We can relate because of the felt consequences. 

The camaraderie is comforting even in uncomfortable spaces of life.

Sharing with others should always be truthful, authentic, and appropriate. The way we share should always honor God and be respectful of others. Yes, there are times of deep pain in which our sharing is more raw, but in the safe places we have nurtured, we are known, and the extremes are kept in the context of our character and growth. At least, that’s what it looks like when we’re healthy. When we’re not, the moments can create unwelcome habits and create altered contexts for moving forward. 

But in that day, through that text thread, two of us were able to encourage each other, and I’m grateful. I’m thankful for God’s abundant blessings of friendships that join messy lives in his healing and grace.

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