Expectations versus reality. If you’re on social media, especially TikTok, you’ve seen the videos—what the expectations were compared to what the reality was. In general, these were intended as humor. I don’t know where they originated, but the earliest ones I remember were Pinterest based. I don’t hear much about Pinterest anymore. In case you aren’t familiar with Pinterest, it is a social media platform that allows you to “pin,” or save, what interests or inspires you to virtual boards that you organize by themes as you determine them. You might have boards for decorated cakes, party centerpieces, and kids’ costumes. Then your TikTok videos would start with the expectation of a lavish cake, decorated as a perfect bouquet of flowers that are transforming into butterflies across the edges of the cake. The cake spins, and it is perfect from every angle with vibrant colors, bright lighting. Perfection. Then the reality portion of the video. Your attempt at the same cake resulted in a lopsided cake that looks like it was shot with a paint gun. Forget the image of a bouquet. It looks more like a haphazard kid’s finger paint project, and when the cake is spun around, it’s obvious the kid has poked his fingers in the cake here and there. The colors are smeared. There are no recognizable butterflies. The cake is questionably edible. Likewise, the picture perfect party centerpieces look like they were pulled out of a landfill. And the kid’s costume looks like it was designed and assembled during a 3-minute party game challenge from a box of random supplies. 

The videos are entertaining. And they help us all in a way, reminding us we’re not picture perfect, and it’s okay. We can’t always emulate those picture perfect images online. At times, those images are not exactly what we think we see. There are filters, lighting, time, experts, and so on. Not to mention, we can’t be the best at everything. We can’t be great at everything. We can’t be good at everything. We can’t even try everything in our lifetime. 

But there’s something else about these videos we can learn from. They are a reminder of the deception involved in the presentation at times. At a point in my life, there was someone sharing some things that weren’t true. Most people knew it. His behavior, how he isolated himself from the people who knew him best, revealed more than he wanted. But sometimes we get ourselves into situations where we have deceived ourselves so much that we convince ourselves what we need to see is what we see. The crooked cake looks like a beautiful cake (or vice versa). Whether the deception begins for others or for ourselves, it bleeds together and we can’t pull it apart. The deception becomes our truth. The expectations and reality become one even when there is a significant difference. 

With a pause, most of us can see the difference, but it requires the pause. That pause is paramount. Are you dealing with expectations or reality today? Are you portraying and communicating expectations or reality today? Know the difference, and live them out appropriately. Each has its place. Each can be based in truth if we simultaneously hold our expectations with reality. The two can co-exist. If they don’t, we might laugh at times, but other times, our reaction will be less humorous. And the impact will likely extend beyond just us. 

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