Responding To Judgment

Responding To Judgment

I caused a bit of a stir with a blog post. Soon after posting the link to Facebook, someone commented on the inappropriateness of a phrase I chose to use. She said it was something a Christian writer shouldn’t say.

I have to admit I thought about deleting the comment. I saw it quickly, so only one person – well, two counting me – would know I had deleted it. I’d clear the way for more positive responses. Then I considered temporarily taking down the post in order to revise it, replacing the phrase with something people might see as less disagreeable. However, I intentionally chose the phrase for impact, so I thought changing the wording would lessen the impact of the post. Perhaps it would just be easier to delete the blog post altogether. It would only take a few clicks. I don’t write in order to create a flurry of discussion.

Oh, wait. Yes, I do.

I write to challenge people to think. I write to refresh them. I write to encourage them. I want people to grow. I want people to respond, because I want to engage them in conversation. I want to spur them to action. My concern was that a word choice would become the focus of the blog post instead of the actual content and lesson I was trying to portray.

I decided rather quickly (the speed of the internet and social networking allows for nothing less) to simply respond with what I hoped was honesty and respect. After all, I appreciated the comment despite feeling judged. I want to know what people think. If people don’t speak out, I don’t know their responses. I can assume, but my assumptions range from people being disinterested to being spurred to life-changing experiences. I’d rather know than assume.

The following day, I received an email from a friend who noticed a typo on my blog. I would usually be thankful, but being tender from the previous day’s judgment, I was a bit defensive. I fixed the problem within a minute, but the sting lasted a bit longer.

What was up with people judging me so much?

Wait. This judgment wasn’t so bad. I could choose to get defensive and assume the judgment was spurred by negative motivation, or despite the motivation behind it, I could learn something from it. I could choose to see it as an opportunity to grow. I could improve my writing because of it. I could practice my gracious response because of it. I could get to know someone better and deepen a relationship because of it.

I could choose mercy.

You must show mercy to others, or God will not show mercy to you when he judges you. But the person who shows mercy can stand without fear at the judgment. (James 2:13)

Whether you’re on the giving or receiving end of judgment today, you have a choice.

Are you willing to err on the side of mercy?

5 thoughts on “Responding To Judgment

  1. Thanks for sharing! I can get too over sensitive. I need the reminder to respond with grace. And I need the reminder to watch the over-critical, judgmental remarks that so easily slip out. I was reminded by a speaker last weekend that I don’t need to say everything that comes to mind … Even if I am right! Lots of areas for learning & growth! Enjoy your weekend!

  2. This hits home. I’ve been struggling with my tongue, quick to judge, feelings of rejection. I am praying for love in my heart and for God to heal the negative emotions that I’m battling. Fill me with your love and mercy Lord!

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