Divorce, My Life with God

Show Up

photo-1464618055434-20b22e97995aWhen hurting people come to church, carrying their burdens, they begin to heal, pouring out what hurts most and trusting God will fill them with peace in the middle of the chaos. I’ve been there. Recently, there have been several others I’ve known are hurting, struggling to breathe through the pain, yet they show up. They engage the best they can. They worship. They inhale and exhale, and that’s an accomplishment.

Not everyone around us knows the pain we feel. They don’t know our grief, hurt, confusion. By sitting beside others without telling them everything, we are not being fake. We have people who we feel safe and transparent with; we’re not trying to hide anything. We’re trying to survive. Those who know what we’re facing see it in our eyes and posture. They know the purity with which we worship.

One of the best places for me to heal in the early days of my ex’s rejection and betrayal was worship services. I was surviving, not aware of many around me. My focus was on God. I savored those tearful moments with him. Such pure moments. Despite me often being unaware of those around me, some took notice. I get that. Seeing a young couple I knew was struggling just that morning come into the door surprised me yet made me smile. I thanked God for their courage. The suddenly-single person grieving over a spouse seemed to soak in the thickness of God’s presence. I thanked God for his transparency.

I thank God for worship, for church, for friendships, for healing. There is so much he provides. It is overwhelming.

Never stop seeking him. Never stop worshiping him.

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