I struggled with the thought of getting my photo taken for the new church directory.
I’ve had my photo taken by myself since the divorce as well as several times throughout the time I was married. Getting my photo taken by myself wasn’t the issue. Getting it taken by myself for the church directory was.
It was a first I didn’t really want to face. My ex had been in those photos for two and a half decades, some with our first born, most with both girls, and the last one by ourselves. Several years had gone by since the last directory was printed.
I thought about the process. No need to coordinate clothing. No need to figure out who would stand or sit where. No need to make sure we were both smiling at the same time. No need to agree on a photo. And so on.
I could avoid some discomfort by not getting my photo taken. But that would mean new people to the church wouldn’t be able to associate my name and face. People who have gone through transitions wouldn’t see me by myself and be reminded how life can still be good and purposeful even through and after betrayal and divorce (or other life transitions). My family wouldn’t see me in the directory.
I made the appointment, and honestly, I never struggled with it again. It was just a photo. It was something I wanted to do as part of my church family. It’s something I wanted to do to lean into God’s strength. It was a moment.
Obedience isn’t my favorite thing. Humility isn’t the easy thing. But God is the best through it all.