It seems this time of the year is full of transitions. It starts as the holidays approach. The schedule and routines shift for special gatherings and events specific to the time of year. Time seems shorter as we try to fit in enough but not too much. It’s a balance for sure. We transition between work responsibilities and family opportunities. We sprinkle in shopping, wrapping, baking, Christmas lights, friends, decorating, and more. Even when we’re intentional with our time, there are transitions and adjustments. This holiday season includes change, whether we see it as positive or negative, because of all the life that’s happened since the prior year. Some people are gone. Some people are new. And the daily routines are different because of work schedules. Kids are out of school and out of their routines. They’re excited and exhausted, appreciative and grumpy. Then we slide into the new year and expect old routines to resume and new routines to develop—smoothly and flawlessly. At least, we want it all to be smooth and flawless.

But transitions are hard—even for those who invite and enjoy change.

Adding a baby to a family is generally experienced as a wonderful addition, but the transition of adding another member to the family is exhausting. Adding a team member at work can alleviate others’ work loads but the transition through training can be a lot for a season. Walking away from a toxic relationship can bring relief and health, but it also reveals some unforeseen changes and losses of redefined connections. A move can welcome opportunities and excitement but also brings stressful expenses and grief over shifting relationships.

Transitions require us to adjust while simultaneously taking care of the majority of our norm. We fit a new routine into the existing, and we don’t always make the wisest decisions of what to take forward with us and what to leave behind. Sometimes we get a warning of the transition, and we’re able to prepare a little. Sometimes we don’t. Even with the best preparations, we’ll find our plans need tweaked among some details we didn’t expect.

No two transitions I’ve experienced have been the same. But here are some things I’ve learned.

• Prepare well, but be flexible. Some people will never tip into the danger zone of over-preparing, but for those who lean toward it, keep in mind you don’t have control over everything. Work on the framework, and be flexible with the final details.
• Be honest. Transitions are times we become overwhelmed and loosen healthy boundaries or unrealistically expect pure consistency around us. Reflect well, choose well, and communicate well.
• Invite growth. Transitions, as overwhelming as they can be at times, invite opportunities for growth. Prune what is no longer healthy. Cultivate what is. And know you can’t do it all at once. Be realistic and patient.

Transitions aren’t seasonal. They’re constant. Learn from them. Learn through them. Every transition might not be comfortable, but we can at least appreciate the clarity they invite.

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