When have you been silent when you should have spoken or spoken when you should have been silent?
We often use the biblical verse “speaking the truth with love” to justify something we feel needs to be said to someone. Perhaps it does need to be said, but let’s commit to the biblical context instead of using the words to rationalize our preferences. Consider three important words included: speak, truth, love.
When we speak the truth with love, we have to actually say the words. We can’t simply wish someone would read our minds. We can’t hint around. We can’t make assumptions that someone knows or will be told by someone else.
Truth is defined by God. We don’t get to decide what the truth is. What we share as truth is often a preference or judgment coming from ourselves instead of from God. Be certain what you’re speaking as truth reflects God’s truth.
Our love is defined by God’s love. We’re created in His image, and He pours everything we need into us, including love. We can justify not saying something because of love or saying something harsh because of love, but only God gets to decide the right response in love.
Speak, truth, love: three threads that are intricately woven together to create a strong cord.
Above all, maintain an intense love for each other, since love covers a multitude of sins. Be hospitable to one another without complaining. (1 Peter 4:8-9)
What do you have difficulty embracing?
How do you handle sin in someone else’s life? Does it differ from how you handle sin in your own life?
How hospitable without complaining are you?
Just as God wants us to love what He loves, He also wants us to know what is outside His intention and ideal. No matter what someone is doing, God doesn’t hate the person. Each person is His creation. God has purpose for each person, whether he or she fulfills it or not. He doesn’t want to lose a single person from eternal life with Him, but He gives us choice, and our eternal lives are impacted by those choices. God hates sin. He hates anything that comes between us and Him. We are made in His image, and He intends for us to become more like Him every moment as we pursue Him through faith. We need to know what He loves and what He doesn’t. However, it’s not about legalism. We cannot consider God’s justice without His grace.
We don’t carry the responsibility of God’s justice. We are not the moral police. He is the judge. There’s a difference between being the judge and jury and being a discerning believer who isn’t gullible enough to accept falsehoods or too proud to acknowledge or assume truth. As we become familiar with God’s will and He stirs the passions within us, He will let us know when we need to respond appropriately to something that angers Him. And He will equip us to confront, speak the truth, and love in His way. We don’t have to fix everything. We don’t need to convict someone. But we also don’t need to stand beside the road and ignore what is outside of God’s intention and ideal. The key is discernment, trusting God’s timing in every response of thought, words and actions. Just as Jesus did, we will often be prompted to embrace the outcasts, ill, and misunderstood.
Give a hug today. In fact, give as many as you can.
If you’ve followed my blog for several years, you might remember when I shared before and after photos of my oldest daughter’s teddy bear, who had been slightly damaged by a dog when she was staying at someone’s house.
Fast forward six years, and my youngest daughter had a similar issue. Only it was her stuffed elephant Fanta, and the damage (accomplished by her own dog), was a bit more than “slight.”
Yes, that’s an elephant, and those are the pieces she brought me in a plastic bag, asking if I could fix him. She was laughing, assuming he was beyond repair. But I did my best:
He has a few replacement parts and fresh stuffing (and I didn’t replace his button eyes in case they were too much of a distraction for the dog), but overall, he looks pretty good.
He’s well-loved, just like my oldest daughter’s Alfred, and my Raggedy Ann and Polar Pop.
Well-loved sometimes means thread-bare and disheveled.
I’ve always liked the book The Velveteen Rabbit. Love makes us all a bit more real. Yes, I’m aware stuffed animals aren’t real like people, but love seems to make people a bit more real. Maybe a little disheveled and worn, too, but well-loved. And well-loving. The two go together – the love we get and the love we give.
God is love. (1 John 4:8) He’s glad to give it. He’s glad to receive it. And when we give and receive it, we’re well-loved and a bit more real.
Sometimes I need to “see” my faith, just to catch a glimpse of something my heart is inextricably wrapped around, although my mind often can’t wrap completely wrap around it.
That’s part of faith. Being certain about the uncertain…and being willing to be uncertain at times. Yes, I know “Those who believe without seeing are blessed” (John 20:29). And that is me some of the time, but that’s not me all of the time. I’m on a journey of faith.
The visuals I sometimes get while reading through Scripture are rarely much about me. Instead, God lets me glimpse Him: His character, willingness, love, and mercy.
He reached down from heaven and took hold of me; He pulled me out of deep waters. He rescued me from my powerful enemy and from those who hated me, for they were too strong for me. (Psalm 18:16-17)
God reaches to me. He takes hold of me. He pulls me and rescues me.
He interacts with me. He’s invested in me. And for that, I am grateful.
I read or heard it multiple times after the news of the tragedy that struck a family and change their lives forever. But they didn’t stand alone. I didn’t hear people talk about what happened to “them,” but that “we” had a tragedy, encompassing the entire community. Sure, not everyone was personally changed, and most certainly no one was affected the way the family was (and is), but the response reminded me of the burden community bears for one another. When we live united, as one, we feel the pain of others. We experience hurt alongside them. It isn’t the same as theirs, but we still feel it. Our hearts break, grieve, and hurt.
The same can be said about the celebrations and successes. We enjoy them together with fervor.
We savor and we endure forever. That’s what sharing life entails. The good and the bad, the heights and depths, the elating and crushing news. Our lives change together. It’s not always pleasant, but sometimes it is. And sometimes we experience some of the sweetest moments of closeness because of the struggles.
Live well together, no matter where you are, what you’re going through, and who is beside you.
“So now, may my Lord’s power be magnified just as You have spoken: The Lord is slow to anger and rich in faithful love, forgiving wrongdoing and rebellion. But He will not leave the guilty unpunished, bringing the consequences of the fathers’ wrongdoing on the children to the third and fourth generation. Please pardon the wrongdoing of this people, in keeping with the greatness of Your faithful love, just as You have forgiven them from Egypt until now.” (Numbers 14:17-19)
We get reassurance from the promise that God “will not leave the guilty unpunished,” and we apply it to the “them” in our lives, often a “them” we categorize and distance ourselves from. It’s easier to make accusations from a distance. When we get close, we realize just how human people are. We see that we have much in common with “them.” Really, there is little difference between us and them. We are guilty, too.
We sometimes focus so much on the promise to punish the guilty that we forget the context of this promise, which also includes the reminder of God’s character of being slow to anger and rich in faithful love. Yes, God is just as much those things to “them” as He is just. He is just as much those things to “us” as He is just.
Also in these verses is a humble plea for God to pardon “their” wrongdoing, asking for forgiveness for “them.” It’s not a blaming, condemning plea. It’s not an assault on “them.” It’s a plea to God. There is no finger-pointing, declaring that YOU need God’s forgiveness. It’s having such compassion, gentleness, and mercy on people that we go to God on their behalf first and foremost, continually and confidently. We tear down the wall between us and them so that we stand and speak on their behalf.