My granddaughter played with a toy while in her car seat and threw it across the backseat, where no one could reach it since we were in the front seat. She was sad that is was no longer within reach and no longer an option to entertain her on the ride.
It reminded me of our reaction to many choices we make. We wonder why we are experiencing frustration, but we don’t make the connection that the frustration is a consequence of a choice we made. Of course, there are other frustrations that are not directly linked to our own choices, but there are likely more connections than we’re willing or able to see. (And there is also constant choices in how we respond to our frustrations.) It’s not helpful to blame and shame ourselves into stagnancy and loathing, but it’s imperative we be honest and humble enough to reflect on the reality of a situation and be willing to put forth effort to heal with others, correct our missteps, and determine the next best path.
My granddaughter adjusted quickly and played with something else. And that’s what we do sometimes; we move on. Moving on can be a good choice, and it can be a poor choice. Staying put can be a good choice, and it can be a poor choice. It’s not so much where we are but why we’re there. What motivates us? What excuses are we making? How well are we taking responsibility? How healthy are we being? Where are we placing our trust and faith?
You won’t know the “why” unless you ask…and are then willing to authentically seek the answer, even if it involves a large dose of your own responsibility.