My daughter and I planned a “super secret adventure” with her daughter. It was her first out of town overnight girls’ trip. We picked her up from daycare and asked what she thought the super secret adventure would be. “Supper at Grandma’s house!”
We definitely over delivered. We could have planned a much smaller event. We weren’t sorry, and she wasn’t disappointed. But that’s not always the result.
Sometimes people under deliver. They promise or build anticipation for something that doesn’t or can’t happen. They paint a picture they can’t or won’t deliver. Or perhaps we expect or assume too much.
What disappoints us? What excites us? What role do we have in it all? Do we expect too much? Or too little? Do we quickly trust, and when it’s broken, do we resist rebuilding it? Do we lean toward under-delivering or over-delivering? How do others’ responses impact us?
The primary question might be “In what do we find joy?” Are the roots of your joy in the internal choice or the external situation? It’s not as simple as asking if you’re a half-full or half-empty person. It’s deeper than a perspective. It’s the authenticity of the experience, which involves reality of what’s happening as well as measured expectations. We temper our responses based in both reality and discernment. We can’t predict the future or read someone’s mind, but we also don’t need to yield to someone’s presentation or promise—whether overwhelming or underwhelming—or to our own romanticized or catastrophic assumptions. We can be wise with the boundaries we set.
When our response is rooted in the authenticity of the experience, It goes beyond a moment. It’s linked to purpose. Where does the moment fit among the context we’ve experienced (the past) and we anticipate (the future)? We have history and hope, and both are alive. The moment falls into the context of both. The moment might surprise us. As we experience more, our history grows, and our anticipation shifts.
Always invite yourself to transparently revisit, remember, and evaluate anticipations. Know the roots of your history and hope grow from shared soil.
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