My mom was out of the country and out of reach for a week. I didn’t think it would be a big deal. I was excited for her to take the trip. I didn’t have anything important to tell her.
But we talk nearly every day.
It was odd to not have the option to reach out to her. Maybe it was on my mind often because we are getting to the age when we especially appreciate the days we have.
There are people I cannot reach out to because of death. I see social media posts every now and then that mention the same sentiment with the encouragement to “appreciate your people while they’re still here.” I think I do. Missing miscommunications with my mom reminded me.
Sometimes we have no communication with someone who is still alive. For instance, my ex pushed me and others out of his life. The habit of wanting to reach out to him and share my life with him was a hard one to break. Because it wasn’t just a habit. It was a relationship I enjoyed and appreciated. But in a sense, bu his choice, he was gone.
I remember as our youngest daughter started transitioning from our home to her adult life, I commented many times about savoring some of the “last times.” I knew they would make way for new times and adventures and memorizes. Transitions can be bittersweet. My ex snapped back one day, declaring he wasn’t going to live in that mindset, that I should move on and quit thinking about it.
While I certainly think we can become consumed with the changes of transitions, I believe reflecting on the truth of them helps us appreciate what is and has been as we anticipate and prepare for the next steps. In order to fully appreciate our today, we need to glance at the context every now and then – not to get stuck but to not get stuck. We need the reality check of where we are and where we’re headed. Otherwise we deceive ourselves about where we and others are.
I want to savor the relationships I have, pouring into others, listening well, giving space, sharing adventures, and being grateful.
Then tomorrow, I will gratefully celebrate those relationships again as they continue and grow.
I love my people.