The deeper I go in my faith, the more I notice even the smallest steps away. I question God’s voice a little more. But I’m also more sure of it than ever. I question not because of arrogant doubt but because I’m serious about getting it right with him, for him.
Several weeks ago, I was in a situation that captured my quick, quiet interactions with God. I found myself in a situation I’d been in many times before, and God has equally led me to two responses. When I responded in either way, I had followed his prompts. There wasn’t an absolute right or wrong route in the situation. Following him and trusting his timing and provision is what made it right, not the specifics.
I saw the need, and I didn’t have an immediate pull to action, but I took a second look. I questioned myself. Had I really taken the time to seek God’s prompting? Did I want to respond out of my own desire? All within thirty seconds, I wavered back and forth. But I soon realized I wasn’t wavering and questioning God. The swerving was more my own process of trying to figure it out. I paused and asked God, “Can you make it a bit more clear?” And then the confirmation. If I had stilled my mind, I would have shortened the process.
It’s not always that quick or simple. But the process is nearly always saturated with peace. God’s peace isn’t what we want it to be at times. It’s not an absence of all uncertainty or turmoil. It’s in the midst of it.