My Life with God

I Can Breathe

photo-1521475711856-a80d1d3845a4I can breathe, and to be honest, I enjoy that freedom—and also feel guilty about it.

Sure, there have been isolated moments or situations in which I couldn’t breathe well, when life closed in and sat heavily on my chest. But those times came because of a choice I’d made or because someone was mistreating me. I’ve written about that season in Fractured Into Wholeness. The mistreatment wasn’t because of who I was but because of who someone else was.

To have someone cut off my breath because of who I am—not really who I am but what I look like. I don’t know if I have the right words to capture what that stirs in me, but it is a deep empathy.

For anyone who has been in a similar situation, I am sorry.

For anyone who fears being in a similar situation, I am sorry.

I can use my breath to help you breathe. I can speak up more. I can listen and engage in difficult situations. I can be aware and stand up for you. I want my breath to help you breathe better.

To say I’m in this with you is pretentious. I’m not really “in” it. I don’t experience the hate and disrespect you do. I don’t experience the assumptions you do. I don’t experience the stares you do. I don’t experience the fear you do.

But I will see you. I will get to know you. I will notice your surroundings and your struggles. And I will speak up when it’s helpful and stand nearby when that’s a better option for you. I won’t tell you what the solution is. I won’t try to fix things. I will let you take the lead and share, and I’ll be closeby.

Because you matter. You are loved.

4 thoughts on “I Can Breathe”

  1. I have several friends on Facebook who are either persons of color themselves or married to a person of color. Many have children and grandchildren who are of other races. Several of their posts break my heart. I have also discovered who is quick to believe media hype. A few people have been blocked or muted. One distant relative has even been unfriended after making hateful comments on my wall underneath a comment from a friend of color thanking me for reposting about the Arbery shooting and helping to take up their cause.
    It is all just very sad.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Indeed. Watching all of this, not just now but for years, highlights for me the unnecessary lack of respect we seem to have for others. We have become inwardly focused and numb to others. We don’t listen well. We can all improve and grow.

      Liked by 1 person

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